I've been thinking lately of the best advice or lesson I've received about my marriage and thought I'd share it. I've heard it from more than one person, but I think the Church teaches it as well and that's where I believe I heard it first. It's really simple but so amazing. Put your spouse first. Love him or her first and then focus on the kids, yourself, everyone else.
Of course we need to Love God first but then love your spouse. I love the look my kids get when Kevin and I hug each other. Shea always has to run in between us saying, "I want hugs! I want hugs!" But that makes perfect sense since his whole being was created from our love. Even Meara, at six months, squeals with delight when I show her a picture of us together. I believe it's intrinsic and makes a child feel so whole when their parents show their love for each other. I was talking to one of my friends about this and he comes from a divorced family. He confirmed what I said by saying, "When my parents didn't get along, all I wanted from my whole being was for them to love each other. I wanted to do absolutely anything for that to happen and that was all that mattered to me." I think it's so easy to get caught up in the day to day, -"The kids need this, the kids need that, I'm exhausted, etc." to the point you don't even connect with your spouse until you're exhausted at the end of the day. Kev and I have tried to make a point to give each other at least one decent hug a day and as silly as that sounds it has done wonders for both of us. It solidifies that we're 'team' in the whole parenting thing, and it shows our kids where our priorities are at. We love our kids so much more when we love each other.
